Weekend Grooming
Current mood: 
Sunday,
Cigarettes lit: 12
Cigarettes actually smoked: 3
Alcohol units consumed: 0
Alcohol units desired: Multiple margaritas
Hello peeps. Welcome to Glancy Corner. I wanted to call it "The Princess and The Peeve", but I'm not always peeved. Still, I think I'm going to copyright the title.
And how was your weekend? Mine has been okay. There were a few opportunities I could have participated in and they all included copious amounts of alcohol, but I decided instead to do a weekend at Chez Glancy, my home sweet home, my castle-ette, my peaceful queendom. Weekends are great for special attention grooming – you know, moisturizing everything with the good stuff, hair treatments, skin treatments, grooming "the garden", shaving/waxing wild hairs, bubble baths – you know, hanging out with a towel wrapped around you, working the beauty beast. Which, by the way, seems to be a losing battle at this stage of life, but a girl has gotta do the best she can!
During my copious ministrations to my epidermal layers, I noticed that the legs (and other parts) were so white that they would blind people when the sun reflected off of them. Because of my pale Anglo-Saxon skin, I learned a long time ago that the sun isn't my friend if the goal is attaining a tan. I burn, blister and peel even with a bazillion SPF sunscreen. End of story. I don't burn and turn brown. So for many years, I have used hundreds of "tan in a bottle" products, and I have tried them all. A couple of years ago I discovered Mystic Tan. You go into the little room, disrobe, put a net over your hair, cover your palms and feet with lotion, step into the booth and the tan sprays on. Not too bad. Because of my pale blank canvas of epidermis, I can't do it too often or I look like someone on the liver transplant list.
Back to this weekend. So I'm looking at my skin and realize I need to do something. Since the fire back in January, funds have been tight and I didn't want to spend the money on a spray tan membership. HOWEVER, I had a bottle of the spray tan stuff the Mystic folks give you to use if your spray-on streaks. I had never used it, but there it sat in the bathroom cabinet alongside the Jergens lotion tanning stuff. Hmm..I don't need to use the Jergens… Let's try the spray. I didn't think it was going to work or cover well. I decided to experiment, and please, don't ask me my reasoning process, I'm menopausal, 'nuff said. I thought, "Hey, I'll spray this on one leg and see how it works…. I can compare it to the unsprayed leg." So that is what I did.
In the meantime, I headed out to my hair appointment. Three hours after the original "spray procedure," I was chatting with the stylist and told her about it and asked if she could tell which leg I sprayed. Well, I'll be darned… one of my legs was very lightly tanned and it looked nice. I went home planning to spray the other leg. I got distracted doing some chores and that evening I noticed that the sprayed leg was much darker than earlier in the day. Still – no problem. It looked great in low level light.
I got up this morning and the bronzers must have gone to work overnight. One of my legs was (and still is) … well…orangey brown … and the other leg was pale white. Ack! Immediately, I headed to the bathroom and applied the stuff to my other leg, but in the meantime I still have one orangey brown leg and one white leg because it takes hours for the color to appear. The thing is, I had plans today to go shopping and swimming, and there I was with my two differently colored legs sticking out of a skirt and a swim suit. I got a few odd looks, but no one said a thing. Seven hours later and the second leg still hasn't caught up color-wise to the first.
I guess I'm wearing long pants to work tomorrow until my legs match again.
I'd love to hear about the goofy things you have done.
Until soon,
Glancy
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